Welcome, Spring

Today is the first day of Spring. However, I don't know about where you live, but here in Middle Tennessee it does NOT feel like Spring today. There is a biting wind whipping through the cold air and we are even under a sever freeze warning for the weekend.

I froze in February. It wasn't just because of the cold, it was me. I froze.

I had some amazing things happen in February. I had my first official speaking gig, I was a part of an amazing destination wedding, and I also helped produce a massive fundraising banquet for a ministry that matters greatly to me and my family. But in the midst of it, I got terribly lost.

My heart was all over the place. Anxiety and doubt was keeping me awake at night. I was really frustrated that all of my grand ideas about carrying out the work I began in January were stalling. I wasn't living up to my unrealistic expectations I placed on myself, or even the realistic ones, for that matter, and I was drowning in a sea of confusion. I couldn't even find the words to communicate what was happening to me. My words felt compromised. My vision seemed blurry. I felt I had completely mis-read what I was supposed to doing. I just completely froze.

While I was in Savannah, I finally heard the Lord speak into my fear. I felt the paralysis begin to thaw. And I started to see the light that was coming. And I knew in my heart, I would not stay in the winter.

However, here we are today, its the first day of Spring and it doesn't feel like we want it to.
Its cold.
Its dreary.
We are in danger of freezing over again.
But it doesn't change the fact that today marks the first day of Spring.
So despite how it feels, the truth remains unchanged.

Where do you need it to be Spring in your life? Where do you need to live outside of how it feels?

Whether you need to circle the truth on your calendar in bright red marker (remind yourself that YES indeed it is the first day of Spring and winter is ending!) or whether your heart needs re-focusing on the things that are unchanging about your business/work/calling, your family, your body, your heart, can you take 5 minutes to gift that to yourself today? Put it in front of you where you will be reminded outside of what your heart and mind, and even the temperature, says.

““See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up, do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” ”

— Isaiah 43:19

Don't freeze.
Don't give up.

Winter is over. You are alive. And you still have something to say, a work to do, and something only YOU can give to each day.

Welcome, Spring.

-------

*Image Notes:
-The tulip image was created using a stock photo from Shay Cochrane's Stock Shop
-The image of the lily bloom is an iPhone image I shot outside the Historic Cotton Exchange in Savannah, GA

Intentionailty and the Process of Perseverance

Hi friends,

The Lord is funny in how He tells a story. That's the only way I know how to even begin.

Walking into this year, from the very first moment I had a distinct inclination that I was on the brink of a season of learning like I had never experienced before. I think ultimately, that was and remains to be the heart behind the acts of intention project. I think I wanted to sew seeds into my life so that whatever I was going to learn would have a place to start. And let me just say, its been quite a ride.

A lot of people have asked me how the project is going, mostly because I think I've been rather silent on the social media front. I think the best way I know how to answer that is, it is definitely going. Going so much I haven't had a real opportunity to use my words the way I would like to over social media. Which when you're trying to walk through a social media driven project, that gets a bit messy, but like I said, God is the one who decided He has a story to tell and things for me to learn.

On our first pass with the snow, there was a break in between the slight dusting and the "holy snow, Batman" we were hit with a day later. I was driving to a meeting near Vanderbilt University's campus. It had all ready been an insane week. My email was FINALLY fixed after 10 days of being messed up, I was short on focused work time and heavy on things that required my attention. My heart was overwhelmed, concerned I was all ready failing everyone in my sphere of influence, and I was late to this meeting.  As I was sitting at a stop light, I saw this guy running in the snow. He was clearly not a seasoned runner and in a lot of discomfort and pain.  For some reason, out of the depths of my soul, I had this overwhelming desire to roll down the window and say "Don't stop! Keep going! Don't give up!"

As I continued to drive, the image of the runner was all over me. Why had this struck such a chord in my hurried heart? Why the desire to emphatically cheer on a stranger? As I thought more about it, I think it was because that was the perfect image of how I currently felt. That I was running hard after a new way of living my life and it was not coming easily and it was pushing me and it hurt.  I realized that because my days were not going the way I wanted, I wanted to quit. I struggle so badly with perfectionism. I put my own spin on it and call it doing things well, but its just plain old crippling perfectionism. If I'm not doing something well, if its not matching up to what I think is good enough, or even intentional enough, I want to stop doing it so I don't ruin it.

But as I watched that runner, as I saw him press on, in horrible weather for seasoned runners, let alone a newcomer, I saw that the Lord was telling me to press on, to press in, to persevere.

“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

— Romans 5:3-5 (NIV)

Perseverance is not a pursuit of perfection, its a constant, intentional choice not to give up.

Its finding the small victories in the midst of a botched plan.
Its soaking in the lessons as they all unfold and believing that they are real and lasting even if they don't make it on to your Instagram feed and not one person knows what's happening.
Its sowing seeds in faith and feeling the Living Water starting to make them grow because even when He doesn't have to send encouragement, He does.

“I’m not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don’t get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I’ve got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back.

So let’s keep focused on that goal, those of us who want everything God has for us. If any of you have something else in mind, something less than total commitment, God will clear your blurred vision—you’ll see it yet! Now that we’re on the right track, let’s stay on it.”

— Philippians 3:14-16- The Message

So all that is to say, I'm still here. I'm still up to my eyeballs in this. There are ideas that I thought were what this project's focus was meant to be that I believe still are, but I think the Lord has expanded it past the start of a new year and a new season. Its opened up my eyes to the process of perseverance and the need to intentionally choose to engage it. And just because the momentum has slowed, doesn't mean I'm down for the count. The race isn't finished. There's more to come. I can't promise it'll be all wrapped up and pretty and on the schedule I set for it, but I'm grateful for a place to share it.

So what about you? On this last Friday in January, where are you? How's your heart?
Whatever it is, the Lord doesn't ask us to come perfectly, He just asks us not to give up.

xo,
Em
 

An "Intentional" Update

Hi y'all!

I hope your first two weeks of 2016 have been lovely! There's been a whole lot happening here in our world as we try to get things rolling in the new brand, diving into the #31actsofkindess project, embracing the start of engagement season with an email address that wasn't working until YESTERDAY, putting out my first Periscopes, and just living our life in the post holiday madness of finding "normal."

I think one of the most interesting things about this acts of intentionality project is it doesn't have to a label for the project to be alive. Its been sweet to hear from those of you who have reached out to say "you may not see it, but I'm with you." There are such good seeds being sewn, friends.

I think one of the most challenging things that I have experienced in this process is how much defeat and frustration I and others have all ready felt this year. Personally, I had a major low point the other day and really need to re-adjust in order to move on. I wrote down my thoughts about needing to marinate in Truth. We're not alone in it, friends.

Its amazing in both of these places, the highs and the lows, I have all ready ridden a roller coaster of emotions and actively seen how much the Lord is going to push me into really learning about surrender and grace in this season. And we're only 14 days in.

What about you? How have your first two weeks been? I would love to hear about it. Don't be a stranger! Let's be insta-friends if we aren't all ready ;)

xo,
Em

PS- The image above is from The Gluesticks Blog and she is offering some AWESOME (and free!) printable organizational tools to start your year off! Check it out!

And... that's a great segue to my....

PROMISED RESOURCES!

Here is a list of some of the resources I have mentioned a couple of times on Periscope and on Instagram and I've been promising I would post links to!

Personality Test

-This takes 10 minutes or less. TRUST ME, its worth it!-

Time Assessment Tool

-This is the time counter tool I have mentioned a couple of times. Its past time to discern what is standing in the way of our productivity and what's holding us back from maintaining our goals. I won't lie, this is a humbling experience, but it SO worth it!-

Books:

I've quoted or referred to two different books quite a bit the last couple of weeks. Here is a link to both of those books where you can purchase them on Amazon. I cannot say enough incredible things about both of them! I've also linked to the authors Instagram handles for daily encouragement and general awesome-ness.

The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst

Restless: Because You Were Made For More by Jennie Allen

Tell Me Something True

Dear Beloved,

Today is just a day.

You are not a failure, you are finite.
You aren't going under for the year, you're only 12 days in.
You can't change what you can't control.
You are loved even if you are lonely.

Have you ever had one of these days? Where everything feels zero to sixty? Where you move from "I'm OK this isn't that bad" to "THE SKY IS FALLING?" and you don't know how to make it stop? The lies. The intimidating beat down of unmet expectations where you suffocate grace and feed off of fear.

I have.

I've sat white-knuckled in the car, willing myself not to let the tears that are building spill over. I've sat down and tried to breathe through the storm brewing in my heart and mind. I've sat down and made myself think about something. Anything other than how I'm feeling.

Eventually, the clouds do break. And there is some sort of relief that comes. Most importantly, in the calming of the storm, you somehow remember that you will not always feel this way.

What is true about the Lord and what is ultimately true about you exists outside of how you feel.

““She tastes and sees that her gain from work [with and for God] is good; her lamp goes not out, but it burns on continually through the night [of trouble, privation, or sorrow, warning away fear doubt and distrust.] ”

— Proverbs 31: 18 (AMP)

It burns.

It burns through.

But it doesn't burn out.

Its a choice to taste and see in the burning.

To taste and see that the Lord is good and His love endures forever. (Psalm 34:8)
To taste and see that her gain from her work is good (Proverbs 31:18) because the Lord wastes nothing. (1 Corinthians 15:58)
To taste and see that He works only for the good of those who love Him. (Romans 8:28)
To taste and see that He will never leave or forsake. (Deuteronomy 31:6)
To taste and see that He has begun a work that is not finished. (Philippians 1:6)

““She girds herself with strength [spiritual, mental and physical fitness for her God-given task] and makes her arms strong and firm. “”

— Proverbs 31:17 (AMP)

What does it mean to taste and see?
What does it mean to burn through the night?
What does it mean to gird oneself with strength?

I think it begins with the Truth. And the truth that I know is written above, but is also penned through song. For me, there are many nights, that for me to keep burning and not to burn out, I have to bathe myself in spirit-led worship. If you're like me, I've made a playlist just for you.

I also encourage you to look up and write down the scriptures above and keep them with you. Moses told the Israelites to literally write God's words on their walls and place them on their foreheads and bind them to their wrists so that the words of the Law would be cemented into their hearts and we would be able to share it from one generation to the next. (Deuteronomy 6:1-9) I love that the Lord knows us so well that He knows we need the truth to be that close to us to survive the storms of our own feelings.

Deep breaths. Tomorrow is a new day.

“But there’s one other thing I remember,
and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:

God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out,
his merciful love couldn’t have dried up.
They’re created new every morning.
How great your faithfulness!
I’m sticking with God (I say it over and over).
He’s all I’ve got left.

God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits,
to the woman who diligently seeks.
It’s a good thing to quietly hope,
quietly hope for help from God.
It’s a good thing when you’re young
to stick it out through the hard times.

When life is heavy and hard to take,
go off by yourself. Enter the silence.
Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions:
Wait for hope to appear.
Don’t run from trouble. Take it full-face.
The “worst” is never the worst.

Why? Because the Master won’t ever
walk out and fail to return.
If he works severely, he also works tenderly.
His stockpiles of loyal love are immense.”

— Lamentations 3:21-33- The Message

31 Acts of Intention Project

Happy Sunday, friends!

I'm so excited to share this project with you guys today. If you tuned in to any of my Periscope broadcasts yesterday, you heard a little bit about it, but if not, let's start from the beginning.

The first week of January, we're excited about our fresh start and the newness and ready to burst into a new year. Which is very healthy I think. I think God knows us enough to know we need a re-set in our calendars. So we make our resolutions, we take the time to think about how to better ourselves and our businesses and get to it. And by week two or three, a lot of us are struggling to get through the day, let alone even attempt to get through our resolutions. This process by itself is NOT a bad one, so hear me say that. But we'll come back to how we can actually make things like this function realistically.

I want the new start. I ache for the fresh chance. I feel personally that I am hard-wired for re-examination this time of year because my birthday falls in tandem with the New Year. However, I think each year, I get lots of grand ideas about how to make changes, and if I'm honest, I go into disaster prevention mode. I move pieces of my life around on a chess board and say, "OK if you can fix this, then this won't happen." Or "if you can lose x amount of pounds, you'll feel better about x." I weigh myself, find where I'm wanting, and then decide what failures I will attempt to prevent. I won't call them resolutions, but they make themselves on to a magic list and when they are not crossed off by the date I deem worthy, they are tossed in the trash and moved over into the column of shame.

Sounds super healthy, right?
Definitely not. lol
But does it sound familiar?

This project has been brewing in my heart for a long time. I've been able to see snippets of the idea, but I haven't been able to truly figure out how to grasp it as a whole. As it started to come together, the doubts started rolling in:
- I do not have time for this, this is crazy
-Other people are going to thing this is crazy and/or stupid
-No one cares about this stuff
-You'll fail at this too.

Eventually this Fall I was given an opportunity to put my words and thoughts together and test the waters with some of these thoughts a bit with other women in my sphere of influence. As it turns out, I wasn't alone after all. There are a lot of us running around spinning too many plates, asking too much of ourselves, and setting unrealistic goals during all parts of the year.

Now what are we going to do?

Well, for me, I want to try something new. And I would love for you to join me.

The definition of intention is to do something on purpose. I don't know about you, but the idea of living a life on purpose sounds refreshing. It doesn't sound like me trying to just make it work and survive every day. It sounds more like the life Jesus said He came to bring us:

““I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows.)” ”

— John 10:10b (Amplified Bible)

This is what the 31 Acts of Intention Project is all about. Its about making intentional choices that can plant seeds into your daily routine, or even into your monthly routine, that would find roots and grow into a life that overflows with joy past the month of January.

““Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things, at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” ”

— 2 Corinthians 9:6-8 (NIV)

I want to sow generously with what I have to give, so that I may reap generously and ultimately, stop feeling like I'm just trying to survive the life I've been given.

Are you with me?

Let's give it a try.

The 31 Acts of Intention Project is based around 4 sub-categories of sowing.

Simply Yours, Simply Ours, Simply Family and Simply Community.

Each of these represents, for the most part, what encompasses the environments and relationships that most affect our lives. Here's a little breakdown of each section:

Simply Yours: Ultimately, everything starts and ends with you. Your heart, your thoughts, your choices. How can we sow generously in other areas, if we don't start with sowing generously and intentionally into ourselves?

““... for out of the abundance (overflow) of the heart, his mouth speaks.””

— Luke 6:45b (Amplified Bible)

Does the verbiage sound familiar? Its definitely not lost on me that we must sow to overflow. But what we are all ready filled with will be what continues to overflow and overwhelm.

*Here are some examples that I am wanting to implement into my life:
-Do one thing this week that makes me feel alive. I've made a list, I'm happy to share it with you, but some of those things are: read, work out, have a deep conversation with a friend, spend time in scripture and prayer. I know that because of the schedule this coming week, I may not be able to do ALL of these things, but I am hoping to achieve one. That's a much more realistic goal.
-Drink a nalgene of water every day. Apparently, only drinking coffee is bad for you. Apparently.
-Before I collapse on the couch and zone out in front of the TV after my daughter has gone to bed, I will a) not leave dishes in the sink so I'm not REALLY annoyed in the morning b) Read something for fun or for soul nourishment for at least 15 minutes
-Don't freak out that our Christmas decor is still up.

Simply Ours: SO is for all of you who are currently in a relationship. Whether you just got engaged, are newly married, or have been married for several years, this is the area where you can be willing to learn and grow. I don't care if you've been married for 50 years, there is ALWAYS something to learn about yourself and how you function in this primary relationship AND something you can learn about your significant other.

*Some examples:
-Do one nice thing for your significant other, no matter how you feel about them.
-Take Gary Chapman's Love Language test. I'm going to definitely talk about this later this month. Its a relationship game changer.
-I want to list a bunch of things, but I'll end up writing a whole other blog. We'll elaborate more on this one later. The first two are great options ;)

Simply Family: SF is open ended to include your given family or the friends/significant relationships in your life that you consider to be like family. This one is super challenging in adulthood. Its heavy on my heart all the time. We need to reexamine our expectations about friendship and be willing to receive each other where we are in this season and not try to make old ways work in the new. Grace abounds, friends.

*Some examples:
-Schedule time with a friend. I don't care if its a Facetime session, a phone call, or if you're a lucky duck, face to face coffee talk, put it on the calendar.
-When you think of a friend/family member, tell them. We are in constant communication with people. Whether its a Facebook post, a text message, whatever, don't wait to tell them you're thinking about them. Even if they don't answer, the heart is what matters. The connection is what matters. We have to get back to fostering our connections.
-I feel that there are many, many people going through tough challenges in life: moving, new babies, divorce/break ups, loss of a loved one or caring for an ill loved one. Whatever the case may be, find one person in your life and ask them what they need. If they don't have an answer, a couple of sure-fire ways, if you have some cash to spare, is to either a) make, or pay for the delivery of, a meal for them or b) send them a cup of coffee. I learned this year that the Starbucks app allows you to send digital gift cards. How amazing is that? You may not be able to grab coffee, but you can send them a cup of comfort.

Simply Community: I think giving back to our community can feel daunting and overwhelming at times. What does that mean? Do I have time for that? I don't have the money to spare. It doesn't have to be complicated or cost a dime, but its the most challenging and intentional choice to make because it calls us to be aware of others and not ourselves in situations that we would not ordinarily be so.

*Some examples:
-If you are involved in a church, a ministry or some kind of non-profit charity, do something to thank the staff. They give their lives away constantly and often thanklessly for the betterment of others. It doesn't matter if your child draws a craft, if you take cupcakes to staff meeting, or again, buy the coffee, offer a meal, ask them what they need; any of it will bless their socks off.
-The next time you're in a public place, smile at everyone.
-Hold open doors for people, be kind and courteous while you drive, let someone go in front of you. do something that is often against our nature and uncommon to experience for a stranger.

This week on Periscope, Instagram and hopefully here on the blog (because again, realistic goals), I will go deeper into each of these categories and how they can be applied or get you started. I would welcome feedback about your ideas! My ideas are not the only ones out there. I can't wait to hear about how you guys apply this into your lives.

There is NO pressure here, friends. This is not a to do list or a daunting challenge that is designed to set you up for failure. In my opinion, doing one thing a day for 31 days is not realistic. It very well may be for you! I can all ready own, that it is not for me and my family. BUT as I become more aware, especially by starting with the Simply Yours category, I know that the Lord will open my eyes to where else I can sow with intentional generosity.

I would love for you to partner with me in this and document it on social media by using the hashtag #31actsofintention. It does not have to be a grand gesture. You saw my list! One of them is to drink water. How simple is that? Let's do this, friends. Not just because we feel like we have to, but because we were made for more than what we've been settling for.

xo,
Em
 

Welcome to the new Simply Yours

Dear friends,

Happy new year! Thank you for stopping by to check out the new face of Simply Yours.

I feel a little bit like a young girl walking into a new office in a place where she's worked for a long time. Same building, same view, same coffee in the break room, but entirely new world.

When I started this company in February of 2008, I was 23 years old, fresh out of college and six months into marriage. I knew that I loved helping people, I loved being the one who could solve the problem with my Mary Poppins sense of readiness, and I knew that I loved weddings. Otherwise, I had a heck of a lot to learn about running a business, about the ins and outs of weddings, the nuances of how people function in relation to weddings, and how to develop my own sense of what made a wedding truly great. Not to mention, why someone should hire me to share any of that information and be able to tell them about it.

Once I started getting my feet wet, the world kept on changing. When I began my business, I booked my first wedding off of my MySpace page, DIY weddings were unheard of, the economy had yet to tank and Facebook was limited to colleges and the most exciting part about it was changing your profile picture. Since then, Social Media has completely changed the vernacular of a generation, Pinterest has changed the wedding world, and Facebook.... well. Its Facebook ;)

Not only did the world grow and change, but Simply Yours has changed. For one, the name got shorter! It started out as Simply Yours Weddings & Etc. I think I was trying to be fancy. I started out as a one woman show, trying to do everything and be everywhere at once. There have been a number of fantastic guys and gals who have worked for me on my team, and we've grown now into a tight-knit family. In the last 8 seasons, we have been a part of over 100 weddings. We have seen so many incredible Brides walk down the aisle, grooms beam as they greet them, first dances, hugs from proud families, happy tears, "we wish you were here" tears, an amazing variety of designs and tastes, colors and textures, and a world of personalities.

On top of all of those changes, and a world of experiences, I have grown and changed. Andrew and I are now 8.5 years into marriage, we've lived in two apartments and house and now we are 3 years into the adventure that is parenting with a beautiful, hilarious and rather sassy little girl we are blessed to call ours. And today, I turn 31 years old.

I think one of the biggest things that has changed in my life, and in turn in the life of Simply Yours, is not so much a change, but a growth. I started out pursuing this career because I really loved helping people and walking with them through what I saw as a challenging season in preparing for marriage, mostly because it was so fresh in my life. Not just because of what we walked through, but also what I was seeing in all of my friends. The joy, excitement, anticipation, constant ideas and big plans colliding with feelings of confusion, uncomfortable conversations about money and life merging, managing shifting family dynamics and reality checks.

Over the years, I have seen all of these things and more. I've had meetings in hospital rooms, umpired a million arguments, dried 1,000 tears, held dozens of hands, and prayed an innumerable amount of prayers.

What I didn't expect, was just how magnanimous the good stuff would be. The overwhelming satisfaction of bringing a dream design to fruition. The CAKE. (Just bein' honest!) But seriously...  The happy tears of a proud parent. The equally hysterical and sentimental toast from the Bride's brother. The truly perfect look on a Groom's face when he sees His Bride for the first time. The Father/Daughter dance. The sacred moments right before I send the Bride down the aisle.... I never would have been able to anticipate the true privilege of bearing witness to these pieces of the lives of my clients. To all our Simply Yours family of the past 8 years... the pleasure has truly been mine.

The new Simply Yours is not a source of major change, its a deepening of what we've always been. And I wanted to be provide us a home that could house all that we have been up until now, and allow us to put down roots for where I believe the Lord is calling us.

I have had multiple veins of this calling going for a couple of years now, where I have been sharing with and helping others in the industry, or those trying to break into the industry. I've also been writing pretty much my entire life, but I've kept it hidden away from the world because honestly, it was scary to share. However, in the last year, I've been given so many opportunities and much support to pursue both of these things in addition to the ins and outs of doing what we do best for our Brides and deepening our knowledge to become better at what we all ready love to do.

And now we have a home for all of it to live together in the same place, where all things Simply Yours: Weddings, Consulting and what I lovingly refer to as all my other Shenanigans, can live in harmony. I can't begin to describe how equally scary and awesome it feels to share it with you!

Now. I know this post is all ready lengthy, but I want to wrap this up by inviting you to celebrate with me! In honor of the launch of the new Simply Yours home, and because its my birthday, I have a special project I've created to start the party! Its called #31actsofintention. Its going to be a project that's based on being intentional with the choices we make walking into the new year, not just making resolutions, but actually planting seeds that will take root and hopefully, grow all year long.

I will elaborate more on it today via social media, particularly Periscope and Instagram so be sure you are following along! I will also dive into it more here in Simply Shenanigans as we get further into January. I just know I've babbled on too long all ready for one day =) I would love for you to join the party.

Thank you for being here today. Thank you for reading. Just... thank you. I can't wait to see what happens next.

xo,
Em